Hello!
I've begun to see things alot differently these few days. It's like looking back at a jigsaw puzzle that you had just got. There were alot of pieces at first and you were confused. But then, you sorted out the pieces and formed a picture. And now i feel as though i'm looking at several jigsaw pieces that i have completed. I don't get the feeling of being lost or confused. I feel very.. complete now and a little different. Maybe all this free time is doing something to me. Something good.
It's like what hurt before now becomes a part of a new puzzle-Me. And the happiness begins to lock itself up like a photograph in an old drawer. But then some moments come and you feel as though they will be too painful to bear but then they come and go and suddenly you feel much better. Sometimes. But sometimes they keep coming back to you like an old tune stuck in the back of your head. And they won't go away. And then sometimes they just fade away and you can't remember the details too well or maybe you just want to forget it all.
I've always considered my dreams to symbolise something. Be it metaphorically or literally. And last night i had the dream of my mother coming after me with a needle and i was crying like a baby who has just been pinched. I kept begging my mother to not do it just because of some other people. I kept on saying "please! don't do this to me because of her" But my mother just kept coming closer and closer and she finally caught up with me. She grabbed my hand and poked the needle through my left middle finger (the finger you use to flip people). And then i woke up.
I've never liked needles. Ever since they started giving me injections when i was three or four, i've always hated them. When i see a needle i just feel very faint and a bit nauseous. Anyway, this feeling of needles grew into hate and then during a Home Econs lesson i nearly poked the needle through my index finger. Nearly.
Anyway, i hope this dream remains a dream. I'm not too fond of anything sharp.
Aloha!
